What would it look like to return to yourself? Imagine that under all your pain and suffering, all the intrusive thoughts, or under the fashion, makeup, and labels is a whole person. A person who has always been whole.

 Returning to self is like wearing your favorite jeans.

When you imagine a favorite pair of pants, think about what it would feel like if they were made just for you. Think to yourself about the feeling you would experience if you didn’t have to wear anything else, EVER AGAIN! There is only one word that comes to my mind, comfort. There is a comfort that we associate with soft fabrics, good food, a song, or a melody that connects to something inside of us. This is what returning to ourselves looks like.

Why do we seek comfort? Because life includes pain and suffering.

This is a FACT!

Not arguable, not preventable, not avoidable, but FACT! Life is full of pain and things that cause us to abandon ourselves.

What seems the most shocking is how much more pain and suffering we experience by arguing, trying to prevent, and trying to avoid pain and suffering!

This seems a little counter-intuitive, right?

How can we return to self?

What if a person could adjust their thinking to work out counter-intuitive behavior, choices, and feelings? What if returning to ourselves wasn’t as complicated as we try to make it?

You can unbury yourself!

The therapeutic process can assist anyone in unburying themselves from the counter-intuitive. When we return to ourselves, we unbury ourselves from what we didn’t choose.


I was shocked to figure out that I was never without me at any point of my life. I was completely buried alive at some points, but I was never gone. – A. Myers


Join me in your imagination. Just take a minute to see if you can sense you in there somewhere. Take a deep breath. Are you getting any proof of life? Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Repeat this action three times!


Most people don’t sense themselves on their first try, so if you did, AWESOME! And if you didn’t, that’s AWESOME too.  You had the courage to look. You took the first step in unburying and returning to yourself.

I dare you to take another step.

Taking the first step to unburying yourself is the hardest.

Each small step we take is progress towards returning to ourselves. Don’t give up on the process.

Take this quote with you.

“Your job is not to be anything like any [other famous or influential person]. In fact, your job is to be as unlike them as you can possibly be. Your only job while you’re here on the planet is to be as good at being you as they are at being them. That’s the deal.” — CAROLINE MCHUGH (Ted Talk)


Check out more about What’s Happening at Wholehearted Counseling.